During this quarantine, I was so amazed and proud to see my entrepreneurial friends get extremely creative in finding new and effective ways of making money during this unusual time. They sought out to offer one-on-one mentoring and group workshops that focused on teaching people new skills from home through a video platform you may already be familiar with called Zoom. I was very impressed with how effective ZOOM webinars were for them. The cool thing about hosting workshops on Zoom versus video content on YouTube is that it is very interactive so you get the chance to actually talk to your audience and answer questions on the spot, versus a pre-recorded video.

Being the curious and confident gal that I am, I sought out to find out if I could also partake in the ongoing Zoom trend. But what would I have to offer? What could I teach that is of value? What am I particularly good at? Fashion, of course, was my first response. However, I have a blog for that and I am always sharing my knowledge on social media. I wanted to offer something more. I began to really dig deep and put some thought into it. I then realized that ever since I was 18 years old, I have actively been involved in several successful startups ( Soon to be 9 start-ups, stay tuned to find out more on this ;)) To be honest, I don’t know of anyone better who knows how to open a business – in what I like to call an interesting and strange market of El Paso, but myself. Not only have I helped develop 8 successful startups over the years, but I also worked for a genius and powerhouse master, the former owner of Tres Mariposas, who taught me everything there is to know about owning and running a successful boutique. I have also been heavily involved in other industries beyond fashion ranging from party halls, hair salons, The Gal Brunch, my mom’s store Tesori and so much more. The more I walked down memory the lane, the more I added to my list. I have experience and sharp skills in marketing, networking, buying, sales, accounting, managing employees, travel, and even architecture! I have done it all during the last 11 years of my life. As I added more and more to my list, I could not help but feel the adrenaline rush through my veins. I
I was so confident that if I was able to help my mother turn her dream into a profitable and successful company with my knowledge and experience, I could help others get their business off the ground! It was then that I realized I had it in me to help others achieve and accomplish their dreams! I was born to inspire, motivate, mentor, and execute.

I rolled up my sleeves and started a 4-series workshop. Each session would be 60 minutes long and I would host two sessions every Friday. I was so nervous to get started. However, I want to add that my motto lately has been “expect nothing, get everything.” In a gist, this reminds me to be present and make the most out of every situation knowing that there is always a lesson to be learned, whether it is failure or success. This mindset and attitude have completely changed my perspective and turned my life around. To my surprise, my first session was completely booked! People wanted to hear what I had to say, but more importantly, they were ready to learn from my experience. I was both humbled and extremely excited. I began my first Zoom session with great confidence knowing that I have put a lot of hard work, passion, and love into this and reminded myself that everything would work out just fine. Well, let me tell you, it turned out to be better than just fine! My first class was actually an hour and a half long ( disclaimer - it only felt like the best 10 minutes of my life! ) To be honest, the only chance I really get to talk about my experiences is through my blog, and although I love sharing them with you, this was different. I was sharing with a group of listeners who were eager to learn and know everything about my career of 11 years in fashion, retail, and business.

Most importantly, I got the opportunity to know each attendee firsthand by name and learned about their dreams and what they wanted to accomplish. I was able to connect with them on a different level sharing words of compassion, care, and shared interests. I have always said, when you do something out of love and passion, the results come in abundance. I was so amazed and surprised by the success and the positive feedback that I received. The sessions were a hit and people wanted more and more. Being able to help others by doing what I love was completely awesome and extremely gratifying.It made me realize that not sharing my knowledge and experience would be selfish of me. I can’t describe what it feels to be able to help and inspire others to make their dreams a reality, other than by sharing that my heart is full of gratitude. This coming Thursday, I will be hosting “The Net with Gesuina” to meet all my fellow students and mentees. I have a lot of surprises in store for them because this is only the beginning of Zoom with Gesuina. Stay tuned.

- Logo purple

The last few months have been unexpectedly insane, to say the least. In the midst of living in panic and uncertainty during this pandemic followed by a series of unfortunate events fueled by hate and racism, it hurts my heart to experience a continuous thread of backlash, bullying, and hatred. Now, more than ever is the time when we need to come together to bring peace and comfort to others and restore faith in humanity. In order to advocate change, we must be willing to initiate change within ourselves.

With that being said, I want to challenge all my readers to practice acts of kindness, gratitude, and courage daily, so that together, we can create a movement that will incite positivity and create a progressive impact in society given the situation that we are currently living in. I invite you to lead by example, and with our example, let us inspire others to do the same and thus create an endless chain of actions.

Kindness and Respect You may be familiar with the old saying “ You can’t understand another person’s experience until you’ve walked a mile in their shoes.” We don’t know what people go through, therefore we should be slow to judge. No matter what religion, skin color, or sexual preference we are all from the same race – the human race. As such, we should speak with kindness and treat one another with respect. Let your actions be driven by compassion and words fueled by love, because believe it or not, kindness is contagious.

Gratitude If you have a roof over your head, food on your table, and something to look forward to every day, know that you are beyond blessed. Let us not take the little things in life for granted. Your trips and gatherings can wait. They won’t make an impact on your future, but who you spend your time with during these days will. I challenge you to keep a gratitude journal and write down 10 things you are grateful for every day. Today, I am thankful for having the opportunity to share this with you. I am grateful to be able to have a voice that inspires others.

Courage Dare to be different and dare to be bold. Don’t fear being different and most of all, don’t be afraid to act with braveness, stand up for your neighbor and do the right thing. It is through acts of courage that we grow as individuals. It is through the seeds of endurance which we plant on this earth that will grow trees of hope in the future. Have the courage to act with righteousness and speak with words of wisdom and hope, especially today, when the world needs it more than ever. With this being said, I really want my readers to take a step back and realize that there is so much hate going on right now and we need to be wiser and use this opportunity to love and bring light to others. It is a time to unite, support, and come together as a community. I would really love for the city of El Paso to be an inspiration and an example. Let’s stand up for peace and hope for a brighter future.

- Logo purple

As I sit here and write the final ending to my magical adventure of my recent trip to Milan, I can’t help but get extremely emotional. That trip was a turning point in my life. It was a beautiful, magical, and exciting experience. As a Sagittarius, I have a strong passion and flair for adventures and new experiences, thus I find myself deeply saddened by the thought and uncertainty we are currently living due to the recent Coronavirus outbreak. I don’t know when this quarantine will end, or when I will be able to return to Italy. I am extremely grateful that I was able to make my dream come true just right before the world turned upside down because it gives me a bit of peace to know that I had lived the happiest moments and now I have unforgettable memories that I hold dear to my heart. I also would like to clarify at this time that a lot of people thought I was moving overseas when the first blog was published. Although, it sounds like a nice dream, moving to Italy is not in the books for me. The tales and stories that I have been sharing with you along the past few weeks are bits and pieces of my unforgettable adventure before the quarantine. This is the last of the seven-part series of my trip to Italy for Fashion Week. I have deeply enjoyed taking you along what I regard as the highlight and blessing of my year. Going forward, I will continue to share my stories and adventures, just focused on my present. The here and the now. So, here it goes, the finale to a seven-part series of my trip to Milan. …We finished our aperitivos and took a stroll down Via Gesu. I saw the most stunning palm print two-piece outfit on the window display at a Versace store. Just days before I had posted a photo on social media because it caused such an impression on me that I had to go back. Here is a fun fact, did you know that the Medusa Gianni Versace chose for the brand has a lot of meaning behind it? He basically chose the medusa because even though she may not be beautiful, she still manages to mesmerize you and makes an impression you can’t ignore. Thus, you end up falling in love. The representation is so true that this outfit had such an effect on me. It was so unique, radical, and eccentric. Of course, I had to come to experience it firsthand.

We walked into the store and of course, celebrities and bloggers were all over the place, all of whom I didn’t know. Marilyn, on the other hand, took a selfie with them and was infatuated with the moment. I told Yihan, the saleswoman, that I needed to try the outfit on. A very “pretty woman” moment I would say. I had no clue how much it was but I thought – YOLO. I followed Yihan to a private room and she gave me the ultimate customer experience. It is very rare that I am on the customer side of the situation as it is usually the other way around. So, this was a treat. She served me champagne in $600 champagne glasses that you can actually find at Tesori, my mom’s store. Yihan wore white gloves to show me all the pieces. She inspired me to step up my game that very same day. She brought me the outfit styled with shoes and jewelry along with more and more and more clothes. Trying on different garments, drinking bubbly, and staring at myself in the mirror, I was having the time of my life. It was retail therapy at its finest. I was enjoying myself and having so much fun. I felt the way my clients feel when they visit GAL, so I now understand what it is like to be in the client’s shoes. Yihan didn’t know anything about me which made it all much more fun and adventurous. It was almost like I was shopping with my BFF who was a bad influence on my wallet. The manager, Giuseppe, came down to meet me and of course, he was gorgeous. He sat down and we had a pleasant conversation as we spoke and started to get to know one another. By the end of the night, I ended up taking almost everything I had tried on! I bought it because of the memories behind the moment. All those pieces felt very special to me and I will keep them forever. One thing that particularly stands out from that day that was that I asked Guiseppe about Americans having fashion careers in Italy. I was curious to find out what are the top money-making jobs in Italy in the fashion industry. His response was completely mind-blowing.
He said that if it is money that you are after, then you won’t find it in fashion. “…Fashion is our culture, our way of life – La Milanese. We don’t do things for money here. We believe in happiness and fashion only happens to be a part of our culture…” It suddenly hit me. The siestas, the aperitivos, opening the shops at 10:00 am, the family culture. That was all their way of life. Not competing or stepping on heads to rise to the top. Working like slaves to have millions of dollars but horrible domestic problems or personal issues. It was completely the opposite of my experience in America. I realized that everyone in Italy had a sense of good vibes. Everyone smiled and was so friendly and easy-going. Being exposed to this Italian lifestyle was so impactful that it changed me.

The next day was sadly the last day in the wonderful city of Milan. We went to the markets and bought beautiful things that we will be launching in the Fall, so stay put! The day was once again perfect. I decided to go to my favorite coffee shop. The one that I visited every day, followed by a short walk around the park. I will never forget that last moment. Feeling the wind brush across my face as the sun was setting and the leaves on the trees trembled. It was absolutely breathtaking. People were walking their dogs and riding their bikes going about their day on a Sunday afternoon. I started to cry. I cried because I didn’t want the trip to end. I cried of happiness as my heart was full of gratitude for the experience, but I couldn’t help but to feel sadness because it was over. It was the perfect ending to my Milanese fashion fairy tale. I sat there and took a deep breath of fresh air as I felt present at that very moment. If I close my eyes now, I can still go back and remember that perfect moment. It was pure bliss. As we arrived at the airport they announced we had made the last flight before the shutdown. I was blessed beyond measure. Milan was officially the 2nd most impacted city in Italy with the coronavirus outbreak. Millions of infections and deaths swept the country. We made it back home safely by the grace of God on the last day before the world was about to change.

- Logo purple

A day in Como.

In between the hustle and the showrooms, I decided to take a short break and make my way to Como, Italy. I had only heard about how special and magical this place was, that I had to see it for myself. My outfit had to be on point so I decided to wear all white. I have this crazy theory that wherever you go that is beautiful, one should wear white. I also had my new silk scarf wrapped around my neck, as you know, a scarf is essential when visiting the sea.

Marilyn and I arrived at the train station, a very ancient, church inspired station. It was the most beautiful train station I have ever seen. It was everything but ordinary. We purchased a one-way ticket to Lake Como. I was ready for a change in scenery.

We made our way to the train pushing through hundreds of people. Marylin led the way. Had it not been for her and her sharp intuition skills, I would have probably gotten lost along the way. She has always been my eyes and ears, and for that, I am very grateful.

We hopped on the train and I could see that there were people from all over the world. Spain, Italy, America. I took my seat and as the train started to go, I looked outside the window to admire a series of blue skies, picturesque towns and villages, and endless miles of mountains. It felt like a movie. Everything was so beautiful. On top of that, the train ride was so peaceful, free of distractions. I was living that very present moment taking it all in and cherishing absolutely everything to the last second. 30 minutes later, which felt more like 10 minutes, and we had arrived at an isolated empty town.

I looked around while Marilyn led the way, as she always does. A taxi drove us to the dock. The sea, mountains, green trees, and fresh crisp air. So perfect, so quaint. There was nothing industrial or commercial about it. There were old brick buildings and houses up high on the mountains. You needed a lift to get up there as you admire pure beauty.

We decided to be adventurous and purchase a boat ticket to the town of Bellagio. Now, I’m not sure why but I associated Bellagio with the hotel in Las Vegas, so I figured we had to go there! Without knowing, this little town was a sight for sore eyes. Bellagio was about to make an impression I would keep for the rest of my life.

We waited in line for the cute boat guy to let us on board. Of course all of the boatmen had to be gorgeous here too. Like I said before, it is like a requisite, you know? It’s like beauty runs through their veins.

We get on the boat and there are other several little towns all over the lake that you can visit within a minute’s distance. The photographic scenery was of a mountain overlooking an island, with green trees and fresh water. So clean and so surreal. There were no signs in sight. No media, no billboards, no nothing. It was plain and simple just like the good old golden days. I took the most relaxing peaceful nap on the boat and when I awoke, I woke up to a dream. We’re here, Bellagio. I’m at a loss for words to describe the absolute beauty that was before me. I can make an attempt, but I know my words will not do justice. It was a small village made of stone brick floors, full of green trees and plants with a dreamlike view that oversaw the lake covered in a light fog with a ray of sunshine. The weather was a bit chilly, not cold but perfect. There was no music, no sounds, it was silent. What? Wait. Nothing is open. To my surprise, it turns out Bellagio is closed from April through November. Who knew they could close out a town!

As always, we make the best out of every situation. Especially if we are half way across the globe! We found one open restaurant and an empty town awaiting to be explored. It was a bit strange, but at the same time, I was enjoying the peace and tranquility. Who knew the ocean breeze and birds chirping would be music to my ears. I had never seen or experienced anything like it. Imagine sitting on a bench while staring at the ocean view with hills and hills of town homes and absolutely no noise. Not one little sound. I embraced the moment and was loving life to the fullest.

Thankful for the open restaurant we found, I ordered myself a classic. Salami, prosciutto, mozzarella and freshly baked bread. More than I could eat but you are only in Italy once! I also had a glass of cold white wine, because wine not? It was just such a beautiful day and such a beautiful sight. I was feeling more than blessed. It was our day off and we were enjoying the most perfect moment. We deserved a bit of tranquility and time off. Before it got late, I asked Marilyn to buy us a ticket for a boat ride back to Como. I turned my chair around to indulge in the view once again as tears began rolling down my face. They were tears of joy. I was not sad, not one bit. For once, in a very long time, I was blessed to be appreciating something so simple yet so beautiful. I was so present in that moment taking everything in thinking, I will never forget this.

I wipe the tears away and sip on my pinot grigio. I hear Spaniards next to me, I love people watching, a family just enjoying themselves all laughing and having a bonding moment. I smiled because I could understand what they were saying and I felt very present, very alive and very happy. Just like that Marylin came back. “Boat leaves in 20. Let’s go.” She said.

I didn’t want to go. I could have stayed in that moment forever but it was about to get dark. So we left.

Coming up next, day 5 of my Milan adventures.

- Logo purple

My trip to Italy was by far one of the most amazing experiences I have lived and I love being able to share all of it with you, especially during tough times like these when we need a break from the crude reality and a breath of fresh air. In the midst of all of this craziness, I would like to take a short break from sharing stories of my trip to Italy and put you up to date on what I have been going through during this quarantine. Brace yourself because what you are about to read is quite a revelation and can’t be unread.

Please know that what I am about to share with you is deeply personal and has taken a lot of courage and vulnerability to speak openly. What you are about to read is not a cry for help, nor am I seeking any kind of attention or validation. As I sit here on my velvet couch writing these words I can’t help but feel confident and inspired to share my story. My intention in sharing my truth is, to be honest, and transparent hoping that my story can help and inspire others. Know that after reading this, if you ever need someone to talk to, if you ever just need to be heard, feel free to reach out to me. There’s nothing like finding confidence and trust in a person or a soulmate, especially during hard times.

So here it goes…

My life has always been about focusing on my image and being a successful professional. I have worked my ass off for years trying to build something for myself. Afraid of judgment and trying to portray the perfect life, I eventually transformed into a perfect little robot. I lived to please everyone living up to the standards of others, making decisions based on what people think of me and valuing the opinions of others over my own. I was far less than perfect. I was so lost and I was unhappy. Instead of confronting my reality and taking control, I would evade it. I escaped with a drink, or two, or I couldn’t remember… My truth is, I became a functioning alcoholic.

I am not sure when it all began or when the situation got out of hand. Had it been years, months, or weeks? I did not want to admit that I was not okay. After all, somehow I still strived to live that perfect glamorous life. Washing down my sorrows with bottles of wine with endless partying and reckless nights, was far from perfection. When I left for Milan I had the best time and somehow forgot about everything. I wanted to move to Italy and escape my reality because I did not dare to confront the truth. Even though I was overseas on business, Italy made me forget the hole I had been digging for myself. Unfortunately, as all good things come to an end, Milan had an expiration date and I had to fly back home. When I came back to face reality, I returned to a shattered lonely life. Life was shit and I hit rock bottom.

For about two years now, I was drinking daily on my own. I was somehow overcompensating for the deep sadness I was feeling. It was Gal’s 4th anniversary and right then and there I hit an all-time low. What was owned to be something worthy of celebration, turned into quite the opposite. I had to cancel an event that my team worked very hard on and had diligently put together. Unfortunately, we didn’t sell enough tickets and I was not willing to put my company at financial risk. I am glad I listened to my gut feeling at the time because only a miracle would have saved me out of that situation.

On top of that, I was only gone for 14 days but it was enough to notice a massive drop in sales. Nothing was being sold. Nothing. People feared I had Coronavirus coming back from Europe. Thankfully I didn’t and I still don’t, by the way. But that didn’t keep them from making strong and hurtful accusations. Finally, reality sunk in. Was this the end of GAL? Was I going to lose my store? I had to do something about it. So I had a huge sale hoping to get back on track.

My heart broke on March 24 when the official notice came in. I had to shut my doors. I was deeply saddened by the situation and I am not going to lie, I was terrified. What on earth would happen to me? I thought for sure I was going to lose the store. I am nothing without GAL. It is part of my identity, it is who I am. My biggest fear came to life. I always dreaded the moment of losing my company. I had already lost myself, I couldn’t bear losing my store. If you take the store away from me you might as well take my life with it. I lost control. I was miserable and I was drinking.

Out of denial, I scheduled a photo shoot. I continued to post and share on social media as if everything was ok. But In reality, I wasn’t ok. Behind the great hair, the glamour, and the so-called perfect life, was darkness, a sense of deep sadness and anger.

Three weeks had gone by and I had hit an ultimate low. I could not leave my bed and was swallowing down my sorrows with bottles of wine. I found myself to be alone and in a very dark place. I needed professional help. After fighting myself for quite sometime I decided to reach out to my life coach, Lulu Gomez. Know that this was not an easy step to take but I am very glad and thankful I found the courage to speak out and ask for guidance. She made me realize that just because I had built GAL on my own, it did not mean GAL was part of my essence. Most importantly, she made me realize I had no idea of who I was. I began to question ‘ who is Gesuina?’

I started to ask myself questions, search within me and analyze my situation. I had always been so hard on myself. Pushing myself to keep up with appearances and pleasing everyone without realizing the harm I was causing myself. It was then when I harshly realized that it wasn’t the idea of losing the store that was breaking me, but rather realizing that the store was the last bit of myself that I was holding on to. I did not realize that I had already lost myself. I had lost self-love and self respect a long time ago. I was breathing and existing, but honestly, I was not living.

I was done trying to compensate for situations that were beyond my control. It was time to take the reins and start doing things for myself. It’s time to rip off the mask and stop pretending everything is ok. This marks the beginning of a new era. This is a new Gesuina. A Gesuina free of demons determined to focus on herself.

Lulu was a great inspiration in my process, but I also want to give credit to myself in helping me overcome this process. I think it is important to note that it was my choice to take that tiny, yet hard, step to become the best version of myself and deal with my problem. I made a decision for me out of self-love.

I am committed to finding myself and learning to love myself again inside and out. I am ready to do things for me, only for me. I have always wanted to be fit and eat healthy, however, I never really had the time. Well, guess what? Now, all I have is time. I have always put the store first, but now it’s time I put Gesuina first. You know, I always wanted to learn more about specific subjects like psychology, finance, music and even become a better writer. Now, I have time to read, write, and learn new things. Running, cleaning, learning and growing. Things I never did on my own that I am finally doing!

Being in isolation during this quarantine made me realize that I had to start living life for me. It also gave me the courage to be able to share something deeply personal that hopefully inspires and motivates you. Also, always remember, you never know what battles people are fighting behind the masks they wear, therefore, always treat everyone with love and compassion Regardless of your story or situation, know that whatever your hardship is, there is always a way out. It is all about perspective. Just remember to love yourself along the way. Most likely, you will never have this much time again for yourself. Think very carefully about how you are going to spend it, and please, never take time for granted.

If your dream is to open your business use this time to put a business plan together. If your dream is to move to Paris, use this time to do research. If you want to make a million dollars in the next five years, learn how to do it! The sky’s the limit, nothing is impossible. For God’s sake, I’m mopping and cooking every day. Now, did any of you ever think that was possible? I know I didn’t. I now love myself enough to make time for the simple things that bring happiness to my life. Love yourself and push yourself for a better life. I hope I inspired someone today by sharing my truth and my story. Blessings to all and sending prayers to everyone.

See you after quarantine <3

-The new Gesuina.

- Logo purple